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A Letter to ‘Oh My God’!

Dear Oh My God!

Dandwatt Pranaam.
(FYI-DandwattPranaam is saying hello in the complete inverted sleeping position. I do it on several occasions. It saves a lot of time…neend ki neend..pranaam ka pranaam..!!!)

Namaskaaram!

Ok. So I am writing to you Lord, because some time back I did something grave; I wrote a letter, Letter to Dilliwaalo. The writing of the letter was not a mistake but the fact that I missed many peculiar habits of Dilliwala’s is such that since then, I have not been able to live peacefully. The sheer feeling of the fact that I left the world deprived of something which was so essential and important for the world to know, more from the social awareness point of view than anything else, had given me many sleepless nights. I am here to correct my misdeed and let the world know of the greatness, that is Dilliwaale. Allow Me pliss…!!!

So let me start, or rather re-start by saying that, for the sake of clarity, I have divided Delhi janta into Dilliawala’s and Dilliwaali’s. And I take this privilege to start with Dilliwala’s. Now, Dilliwalas have the most loose eye-sockets. It hangs out at least half a feet out whenever they see good smart hot pants belonging to the opposite sex. I understand that this frustrated and sexually-deprived breed cant be entirely blamed for this. There sexual deprivation was at one-point-of-time, the most talked about thing of Dilli after the deadly bluelines creating red-lines all over. Their sexual frustration made it to the national and international headlines. Also, Dilliwaali’s are a very good plush breed of hot pants; even I fall from them at times but I have restrained from them more-or-less.

The second point that I would lowe to make about the Dilliwala’s-Dilliwaali’s is that come what may, whether they have a proper place stay or not, they will try and have the most expensive car available. Also, whether there is parking space outside their palace (pun intended; did you get it? There is no practical possibility of a palace in Delhi; specially after the CWG happened to the city…but yaa, we can look at another fly-over, if you wish) or even in the vicinity, but that super car has to be there. And believe me you, my chotu car stands right besides that big big car—shining smiling bright.)

OK I am very very emotional now. ‘Oh My God’, please help me.

So my third point. This is not a point but my urge to you. Considering your limited of knowledge of the sub-continental geography (no it is in no way related to the sub-continental food), you must try and learn more and more about your country; yes, I am talking about India, that’s the name. I know that you have the Parliament House, The Rashtrapati Bhawan, The Qutab Minar, and The Metro; and now to you also have CWG, but all that is because your land is national capital. However, the world or for that matter our country is huge, large and great, and I think you should try and learn more about it. And this request of mine goes beyond knowing what you already know. For example, not every person who is from Noida or from any other part of the state of Uttar Pradesh or Bihar is a thief or can be used for a servant. In fact to learn more about these states, start with going through google maps and finding out where exactly these two integral part of the country lie. There is more to UP than just Noida and Taj Mahal and more to Bihar than Lalu Yadav.
And yes, both these states, specially Bihar, may be the labour colony of the world. But this is not because its their fault or mis(h)take. Its just that our political masters chose to bring some of us to the level that you are and some were deprived.

With this, I rest my case ‘Oh My Lord’. Now it is for you to decide the guilty. [oho bhai….ye too much ho gaya!]

Aapka param bhakt!

5 thoughts on “A Letter to ‘Oh My God’!

  1. again a wonderful articl from u.. i really want pple to read dis so dat dey can also get to know the oder side of our capital..dilli. really u havent left ne point. best part of ur articl is d language u r using is really humorous. i lowed it !!

  2. Pingback: Letter to Dilliwaalo – Part 2 « India Remixed

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