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Letter to Dilliwaalo

Dear Respected Dilliwaalo,

Yeah...I am the KING...and excuse me...who's NAKED?

I write to you on behalf of the Rest of India (which definitely does not include the phamous thok-re’s of Maharashtra. They are above and beyond mediocrity which is an integral character trait of an average normal Indian). Let me make something very-very clear that this is not a Delhi bashing trip in any way. It’s just to let you what the Rest of India had always wanted to tell you but just could not because we were so stuck with our own problems that we did not get the opportunity to express our deep heartfelt feeling. Also, by what I know of Delhi and its responsible, loving and caring residents, the rest of India for them does not extend beyond Jaipur (Rajasthan), Noida, Agra (UP), and Gurgaon, Chandigarh (Haryana). Or else they skip the entire length and breadth of India to reach Bombay (aahh…sorry Mumbai I meant); no Bangalore stands no chance and Madras is anyways out of India into the Indian Ocean, close to Sri Lanka. For a detailed and more elaborate look at the India through eyes of a Delhite, have a look at this. And believe me, all this is not made up but a confession made by many Delhites I have now known for years.

So now that I have set the context straight, let me start.

Let me put first things first and make one point very clear. Delhi was not made the capital of India because this place or its residents (read as YOU) were extra-qualified or you emerged as the winner of some popularity contest.
Someone somewhere decided that you shall get everything and you got. Also, if you pay a little detailed attention to the structure and infrastructure you have, only the Bahai’s temple (Lotus Temple) and the Delhi Metro are the only two things that are post-independence landmarks in the city. So this ends here.

Also, while I totally understand that you are the most educated and elite class of people who GOD has ever produced (I love to believe what you believe; and this is just to make yourself comfortable). However, without going by the word, one thing that caught my attention on 22 Aug. 2007 1400 hrs, is that the main way of addressing people here is with the greeting B***C***” [will now be referred to as pain-cho] (no offense; I personally am a ‘once-in-a-while’ abuser and that extreme points like these come annually into my life). This is the most-frequently-used word in Delhi and should be used multiple times even in a 10 word-long sentence. It’s considered rude if you do not start a conversation with this word. Some examples for your reference: pain-cho mood kharab kar diya in pain-cho ne. And this ends here.

Now coming to the brighter side of Delhi. Brighter side because Delhi has been most in the news for all these reason. Delhi recently won some international award for largest no. of rapes within city limits and most chaotic traffic system. Also, something which is still called the ‘Lifeline of Delhi’ more so because it keeps a check on the life’s of Delhites – BLUELINE which consists of city buses and whose job is to take people from one place to the other; even from the Earth to heavenly abode. The last thing of Delhi that I can remember are the ever-phamous Momos on every crossing.

And last but in no ways the least, presenting before you – Dilli ki sardi and garmi. Now this interesting; kids in Delhi have their counting from 0 – 48 intact and on finger-tips. It’s because it’s the range of temperature that teaches you and can make you a master at it, within just 4 months. FREE FREE FREE

Ok and I also wanted to mention about the Delhi MMS clip and the joy’s attached to it. But never mind…next time.
Kyunki…picture abhi baaki hai mere dost..!!!

And yes before you thank me for the enlightenment, I shall do it.

Thank you,

Aapka agyakaari mitr

And I am so sure you will thank me for all the above enlightenement!!


6 thoughts on “Letter to Dilliwaalo

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention Letter to Dilliwaalo « India Remixed -- Topsy.com

  2. hahahhaa yes this is so true….bhaiya u r a gud observer… and ya if picture abhi baaki hai den m waiting for the 2nd half of this movie coz it is damn interesting 🙂 loved it to the core 🙂 🙂

  3. Pingback: A Letter to ‘Oh My God’! « India Remixed

  4. Pingback: Letter to Dilliwaalo – Part 2 « India Remixed

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